yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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