so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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