; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
