That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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