i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
