I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Betty ford says i'm here all night
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
