Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
