I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
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