I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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