Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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