Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
