I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
