Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
