Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
