I heard we made out
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
This is my gift to your gina
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Randomize
