Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
