How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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