recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
