She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I see more hoeing in ur future
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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