bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
