"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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