false alarm. still invincible.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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