I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
