I just made out with a guy for $7.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
