fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Houston, we have a blender
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
