Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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