we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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