I want to have your abortion
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
