I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
