You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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