Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
