community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
