I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
