My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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