Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
