Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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