I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
