He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
