I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Randomize
