Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
