fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
