so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Randomize
