her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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