Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
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