May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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