Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
We are two peas in an std pod
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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