Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
