P.S. I can't hear my feet
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
