we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
