She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
